Wednesday, March 2, 2016

F*ck the (Female) Nipple!

"Oh noes! Muh feelz...!" Prison and sex offender registry. For exposing nipples. Because that's "reasonable". And rational. Because, too, nipples are exactly as "objectively" horrifying as fornicating in public (which is the Draconian penalty already in the existing statute).

But despite Part First Articles 2 and 22 of the NH Constitution -- they cover "equal protection" and "free speech" -- only a female nipple, mind you, is the object of this, um, heightened scrutiny. Male nipples would still be a-ok -- just since the '30s, though, 'cuz that's allowed to change over time (and even if he's taking hormones to enlarge his breasts, well, as long as he has a penis -- even if you can't see it, can't know that -- there's no problem). But nothing now can change anymore. Societal norms should henceforth be frozen in time. It's for the children, y'see -- who nevertheless see a lot of nipples very early in life, and don't seem traumatized at all -- until they're trained to be. Oh, the humanity...

HB1525-FN, "relative to the circumstances that constitute indecent exposure and lewdness," before your buds and mine, the NH House Criminal Justice Committee, 2/29/2016, where you'll hear, at just a bit after the hour mark, a testifying attorney, who understands what the Constitutions protect, matter-of-factly say "fuck the draft" in a public hearing (which still doesn't warrant hysteria equivalent to that engendered by a female nipple, given the serene reaction). Because apparently there's nothing more pressing -- let alone more rights-affirming or less presumptuously patronizingly paternalistic (even from 20-year-old women with confused arguments) -- for them to be doing...

Within 24 hours, the committee had voted unanimously to 'ITL' the bill -- which is its recommendation to the full House to kill it, that degree of consensus on which is rarely ignored...

(sorry for the delay: video editor suddenly decided it wasn't going to play nice with the ancient GPU anymore...)

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